I'd like to thank Radix and Nate for their steadfast dedication and hosting/processing provisions, and I'd also like to thank Aquatiger for some early pointers. As you can tell, my dear parents were gullible enough into buying videogames based on television shows and movies, but oh well. There's not much to say about this game. I altered the default controls a smidgeon, so that "Special" and "Jump" were assigned to "A" and "B," respectively; I feel I should be able to run and jump without having to lift my thumb. Also, my only goal was to finish the game without any deaths, and I succeeded.

Sidewalk: Perfect. A considerable time passed before I realized that I could actually clear both a crevasse and a lawnmower in a single bound; this epiphany helped, tremendously.

Kitchen: Perfect.

Icemaker: I hesitate before taking damage from the I Scream, as he normally is not in my way. Also, the final walrus scores an extra hit, but this often occurs. Otherwise, 'twas a solid run.

Zoo: Were it not for the blatant accident at the third giraffe, I would not have suffered any damage.

Monkey Cage: Perfect.

Aviary: Ahhh, the classically irritating aviary level. Actually, my only error was taking a hit from the notorious, final vine, but this is almost expected, anyway.

City Streets: Almost perfect. The final firemen apparently decided to disallow finishing attacks for a moment, as he hits me in my innocent ignorance that pushing the C button would not work at this juncture; luckily, though, I didn't need to drop down a few levels on the construction frames to grab the powdered toast, so I made some extra time, there.

Bike Ride: Okay, I must humble myself before you, the modest audience, and repent for this appalling performance. Honestly, the ride wasn't one of my worst, but it's just so damn uncooperative, it almost cannot be managed without taking some palpable pain. In any event, this scene cannot be significantly shortened or lengthened, since it is scrolling, so I didn't lose any time. At least I performed a perfect descent at the end, evading all of the potholes.

Pound: Perfect.

Pound Sewers: Perfect, but I take unnecessary damage from the final anvil.

Wrestling Match: Perfect. In case you were wondering, I only venture into the left side of the ring because the right side is particularly littered with glitches; typically, if I run to the right, the wrestler in the ring teleports to my exact location and causes a nefarious amount of damage.

Outdoors: This was one of my better runs. Only one mosquito damages me.

Outdoors II: Unfortunately, this wasn't one of my prettiest. In my own defense, I've never done all that well here in my past experiences, but I don't suppose this exonerates me from my paltry exectuion. I take damage once, and Stimpy is hellbent on exhibiting the unfathomable A.I. construction by Bluesky. This level definitely cost me up to five seconds, or so. I'm quite glad, though, that I absconded with both Powdered Toasts in this scene...

Mutate-O-Matic: Hands down, this is my best run of this despicable area. Even though I make use of nearly all of my restored lifebar, I was taken aback by how well the level went. And FYI, at the start, I have to wait for the air bubbles to reach a certain height if I intend to ascend to the top as quickly as possible. Once out, and after taking necessary damage from the sparks and candle flame, I make a personal record for jumping up the infuriating light bulbs of doom; I incur only two hits! From there, the rest of the level is flawless.

Enjoy the poorly choreographed and absolutely ridiculous excuse for an ending cinema. Bluesky must've put all of ten seconds into planning it; they were probably busy conjuring the exquisitely clever Raptor ending for Jurassic Park. Sorry to namedrop.